Me And Thanksgiving

Twenty Thanksgivings ago I wrote my first article for a newspaper. I called it “Thanksgiving is a Holiday That Needs to Grow on You.” It was 1997. My wife, Joyce, and I lived in a little apartment with our baby girl in the Old Brooklyn neighborhood of Cleveland. I was reacquainted with the story while…

As I Lay Thinking

Outside the wind howls. Snow falls sideways. Houses wail like wounded dogs. My city is a snow globe under siege. Luckily, I’m inside wrapped in 48 blankets. A man-made cocoon, warm as a bagel. Thoughts dance like Gregory Hines in my head: The band, Simple Minds, on why it won’t be taking the ACT this…

Rowing Down The Stream Of Consciousness

Monday, April 18th, 2016. 5:14 AM. I wonder how many people are up writing right now? Are they writing fiction? Perhaps something for work? We’re out here. Like rowers on the Cuyahoga River. Type, type, type instead of splash, splash, splash. Or whatever water sounds like when oars are pushing it away so the boat…

Sports Illustrated

When I was 9 Dad bought me my first Sports Illustrated. May 3rd, 1976. Mike Schmidt was on the cover. We were inside 7-11 waiting for Mom. He was perusing the rack. I was right there beside him, penniless, my mouth watering at the prospect of owning that magazine. I had just started playing baseball.…

And Now A Word From Our Sponsor

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Liam Meets A Desperate Woman

She sat on the cooler and drank cold beers in front of him. She had him sitting against a tree, his hands tied behind his back. A pit bull snarled within mauling distance. A gun, 9 mm, sat at her feet. This is what she hit him with, knocking him out so she could bring him…

The Anniversary Gift

Two men in paper hats clink mugs together before downing their milkshakes. “Today was some day, huh?” “You got that right.” “Still like working here, Nick?” “What’s not to like. I’m surrounded by food and nice people. You?” “I don’t know, Nick. I’ve been here 17 years. Do you realize I have never taken a…

The Librarian

“Don’t you ever check out any books beside books on baseball?” “Try saying that three times fast while holding your tongue.” “Excuse me?” “You said something sarcastic to me, so I thought I’d return the favor.” “But you’re like 8 years old.” “And you’re like 88 years old. Let me check out the kinds of…

Purple Crayons

I loved purple crayons when I was a kid. Loved every shade of them. Loved the way they smelled, even though all crayons smell the same. My brother and I colored pictures in the living room. He made sure to use all of the crayons evenly so one wouldn’t wear out more than the others.…

How Seamus Turned His Life Around

Seamus was 31 years old when he stole his first Big Boy statue. Drove it 180 miles south and dumped it in a river. It was big and heavy but no match for his pickup. He chained it down nice and good and took off around 3 in the morning. If anyone had seen him,…