Time Travel Blues

Recently, at a trade show snack bar at McCormick Place in Chicago… Sometimes my ideas start on cocktail napkins. I was coming up with something for the flux capacitor. I took a long look at the logo on the napkin in front of me, my scribbles and sketches of flux capacitors alongside it. It was…

Rabbits Talk About World Rankings (And Other Stuff)

The “World’s Most Famous Rabbits List” is out and some rabbits aren’t happy about it. The Easter Bunny: Unbelievable. I’m currently ranked 5th on the World’s Most Famous Rabbits poll. On Easter, for crying out loud! Let’s see who’s in front of me. 1. Bugs Bunny? 2. Br’er Rabbit? Hey, Br’er, what’s with the apostrophe?…

Brilliant Disguise

In 1988, Jim Henson created a muppet named Spruce Springsteen and auctioned him off for charity at an event called the Night of 100 Trees. His legacy lives on in the heart and mind of perhaps one person on a tree farm in the American heartland. Here we see a farmer calling his children together.…

The Christmas Of 1998

Even though Eunice was not quite two she had already had her share of meaningful conversations with imaginary friends. My wife, a victim of last minute gift wrapping, was fast asleep in our bedroom. Eunice was playing in the living room amid a pile of books, stuffed animals and unopened presents. The Christmas tree, dressed…

Abuse Runs Deep At Scrooge & Marley

It happens every Christmas. A cheap, insensitive curmudgeon named Ebenezer Scrooge gets spooked by a dead business partner named Jacob Marley and three ghosts. He becomes nice. Then at some point down the road he gets mean again.  Until the following Christmas when he gets nice – again. How soon after Christmas does Scrooge fall off…

Nobody Folds Like A-1 Folding

Let A-1 Folding fold everything you have lying around your house or business. Shirts, pants, chairs, blankets, beach towels and more! Wrote something down on a piece of paper, but it won’t fit in your pocket? Give it to us! We fold everything! We once took a dollar bill and folded it into thirds so…

The Pitch

EFG Window Washing, LLC. Cleveland, Ohio. A clear summer day overlooking Lake Erie. Do you like books? One of the things I like about books is their ability to tell stories that make people want to read them over and over again. I studied history in college because history majors are required to read a…

A Boy Talks To Crows About A Girl

One morning before school Little Joe was sitting on a park bench surrounded by crows. Little Joe had a crush on a girl named Kathleen. Kathleen was a cheerleading captain. She had an award-winning smile and a multitude of impeccable physical features. But Kathleen was too busy dating Chet Farkus to notice that Little Joe…