Honey, I Misplaced My Participle!

Participle

We’ve heard about him for years. Teachers warned us to stay away from him. Now he’s starring in what critics say could be the blockbuster hit of the summer. In the tradition of Honey, I Shrunk The Kids! and Honey, I Blew Up The Kid! comes a new comedy called Honey, I Misplaced My Participle! The quirky and erratic Dangling Participle, voiced by Steve Buscemi, stars with Judd Nelson in this comedy about a stressed-out advertising executive who forgets to proofread his work before sending it to the printer.

Stan Perko (Judd Nelson) is living the American Dream. He has a loving wife, four kids and a bungalow on the west side of Cleveland. After years of working for practically every agency in Ohio, he decides to go out on his own. Funds are low so he operates as a one-man company. This leaves him little time for anything else, especially sleep. When he realizes that he wrote a direct mail piece that contains a dangling participle his life starts to unravel. Will Stan be able to avert disaster for both his and his client’s businesses?

Dangling Participle, affectionately nicknamed P. Dangle, is the film’s unlikely hero. He feels he was put on that direct mail piece for a reason. He’s been a victim for too long and he wants to get some things off his chest. It’s not his fault when writers put him in the wrong place! He wants to show the world that he is just like any other participle. “Don’t leave me dangling!” is the movie’s catch phrase.

Critics are praising the movie. “Spellbinding performance!” proclaims Newsweek. Writer’s Digest says, “See this movie before sending us your submissions…our editor is costing us a fortune!”

No one is more surprised about his recent stardom than Dangling Participle. “Most leading roles go to persons – not places or things,” said Dangling Participle from his home on page 304 in the Harbrace College Handbook. “I’d like to thank my Aunt E. Cedent for believing in me when no one else did!”

“Dangling has the ability to alter the meaning of sentences by being in the wrong place,” said director Scott Pinchak. “He is exactly what we were looking for when we set out to make this film.” When asked what it was like to work with P. Dangle, Judd Nelson covered his face, got in his car and drove off. Sources close to the actor say that Nelson plans to never work with any member of the Participle family again.

Honey, I Misplaced My Participle! opens in theaters in time for back to school.

Illustration by Joyce Sajovie

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